Two or three years ago, I set out on a challenge to watch every piece of media that the greatest actor of our times, Jim Carrey, has generated over his prolific career. I failed. But hear me out, I watched enough of his movies to know what someone should skip or watch.
This how I will organize my list, by skip or watch. I’m not going to list everything that he made but the essential movies that I enjoyed or despised.
Rubberface – 1979
As you can tell by the photo, this is apart of a special genre of movies that have basically nothing with the star on the cover. Usually this means that they have a two second cameo, but this is a special one since Jim Carrey is actually in this movie. It’s not good. The star of the movie is this girl named Janet who has some self esteem issues, and decides one day to become a comic as research for a school paper. She’s very whiny and I couldn’t stand her at all, there wasn’t anything to her, she existed to mope and sulk about her life. Jim Carrey’s character is basically there to hype her up when she does one of her disney channel comedy routines. It’s not good, not even as a tv movie it isn’t great in that aspect. Don’t watch this.
The Majestic – 2001
I really tried to like this one, I thought that there was something wrong with me, but no, I wasn’t feeling this movie. I thought that the movie was overlong, the interesting parts were earlier in the movie and it was a bit cliche. I wouldn’t care about the last part if I wasn’t watching a movie starring Jim Carrey. Even in his dramatic roles, he always adds some extra flavor to the movie. But with this one… that role could of been played by anyone else, it wasn’t special. Skip.
Copper Mountain – 1983
At least Rubberface was an actual movie. This is just concert footage mixed in with 10 minutes of Jim Carrey cracking jokes. They aren’t even funny, remember this is way before Carrey developed his routine. So he just interjects these impressions out of nowhere, it’s trash. Just watch his old routines on YouTube if you want to see his early work, same for Rubberface.
Once Bitten – 1985
So much fun.
So much fun.
This is one of Jim Carrey’s earlier roles, so don’t expect the classic Carrey antics. This is still when his impression routines were the main course of his comedy. But this is really notable, since he isn’t the joker in this comedy movie. Instead, we can see how great he will be with his dramatic roles in the future in scenes of the film where he has to flex those acting muscles. Okay, it isn’t the best movie, it’s a pretty standard 80’s comedy movie. It’s about this dude named Mark who get bitten by a vampire while he’s trying to get lucky. It’s stupid but I love it, especially the dance off between the vampire lady and his girlfriend. Watch.
Me, Myself, and Irene – 2000
Everyone says that The Cable Guy is one of his most underrated comedies, but I object to this claim. No one talks about this movie so this should be the most underrated out of the two. Jim Carrey plays this happy go lucky guy named Charlie who has been taking L’s since the beginning of time. One day his psyche has had enough of the constant clowning, and he switches to a different persona, called Hank. Oh my god, I love this movie. It’s so extra, everything is so stupid. For example, when Hank drags the girl at the grocery store for fucking with Charlie. I’m laughing thinking about it.
The Number 23 – 2007
I loved this movie. I think it had what The Majestic lacked, it was a Jim Carrey movie to me. You can see that he put something into the movie. Jim Carrey plays two roles, a dog catcher, and this mysterious detective that the latter reads in a book. There’s this a whole mystery around the book, and of course it’s cliche, but it’s entertaining. He has all of these tattoos and crouches around murder scenes while making one liners. It’s amazing. It’s really fun to watch this story unfold and go in ways that you might not expect. Definitely watch, if not only for the detective scenes.
Hi. It’s been a long time, five years to be exact. This was the year I started this blog and I intended to post a lot of things on here. That…didn’t really happen. But I’m here, and I intend to grow this blog into a blossoming flower. The most beautiful and fruitful flower of all the interwebs. This is a general blog, but I’m sure as time goes on, there will be a pattern to what I typically post. So yeah. Enjoy.
The castle was strangely beautiful. It’s dark features were almost intimidating and scary, with it’s rustic and dated features very uninviting. But something about it was very alluring and stunning to him.
It’s long columns, thin and sharp looking seemed if it would almost just jump out and stab the man in the back. He hoped not. But the air was windy and the rain was sharp and piercing. The travelling had ached his body, and combined with the harsh conditions outside made him reconsider.
He approached the castle slowly as it reflected the dazzling electric blue of the thunderstorm. Until the thunder cracked and he quickly fled to find refuge in the beautiful Gothic castle.
The door opened with a painful creak as the man carefully slid inside. The interior was even more beautiful, a spiralling marble floor that reflected just the slightest touch, a giant dim chandelier with black jewels and crystals that showered its light down the floor submerging it in a dark embrace. He was afraid that he had awoken someone, when he heard the faint and delicate footsteps. What would they do?
It turned out that he was right. A woman with long dark hair and piercing eyes suddenly appeared at the top of the stairs. She walked down the stairs, her eyes not leaving his gaze. “Hello,” she spoke, pushing her mass of hair away from her face. He was speechless.
Her eyebrows, full and bushy were raised at him. “Hello, er…um, I was wondering… if you could let me stay for just a while,” His shaking hand nervously pulled out a soggy bill. “I have money.” He walked over to the stairs, and approached her, careful not to trip over her long black satin nightdress with a movement of his legs.
“Yes. I do. It’s just…” She stared down at the descending stairs. “No one really comes around this time of year.” The woman grabbed the bill and quickly went up, surprising him, on her way of going up the stairs with a sense of purpose and grace and yet doing it in the fastest way possible despite her long nightdress. He attempted to catch up.
They walked on the endless stairs as the traveller needlessly attempted to run to her, which wasn’t working out. “So, what do you do.” she asked, when he finally caught up to her at the end of the hallway, leading them to two doors.
“I write… I’m a writer.” he said, between his pants.
She said nothing and instead began to search for her key to the room. “You don’t care if your room is next to mine, it’s the only room I am able to find now.” He nodded and she tossed him the key.
Before she headed to her own room, he suddenly stood in her path. “My name is Luc,” he abruptly said. He wondered if she saw how awkward he looked, but she didn’t see that. Instead she smiled, her face radiated a warmth that was returning from years of dormancy and overcome by this, she looked down.
“Valentina. Goodnight, Luc.” She turned around quickly and closed her door before he could even think of a response. He walked into his room, and the blinding light arising from a shaft in the curtain caught his eye. It was bright outside, the warm luminance struggling to get out of its confines in the curtains. He had only one question before the exhausted traveller headed to bed.
Why did she say Goodnight?
Luc woke up, groggy in the middle of the day. After a few minutes trying to go back to sleep, he eventually sat up and wondered what he was going to do. He couldn’t write, the thought of it made his head spin and mouth gag. Although, he did get here by trying to recover from his extreme writer’s block, so he would try to write. But not now. He paced around the room. He thought of Valentina. Something about her intrigued him greatly, why would someone like her live in isolation, in that giant castle? A thousand scenarios raced in his head, faster than he could even think. Could she be running away from someone? Could she be a fugitive? Or in the Witness Protection Program?
Luc thought of all the men who had also thought this way. He wondered if they even tried to confess to her or did they stay away from the challenge and move on? What was the challenge? Why did they run away? His mind jumped to this and that, until he was interrupted by a old woman vacuuming near by. Surprised, he was by the sudden intrusion, he opened the door.
The old woman stopped vacuuming and looked at him skeptically until a glimmer of recognition shone on her face. “Oh, It’s you! The writer Valentina was talking about! Wow, you look more handsome than expected. I’m Katya, I clean the house.” He didn’t know whether to consider it an insult or a compliment.
“Does she always sleep during the day?” she stopped holding the vacuum and stared at him blindly, it was like she was finding something to say.
“Valentina prefers not be near it, she has a condition in which she is very sensitive to light.” Katya spoke, trying her best to sound convincing. Luc wasn’t convinced, the almost stilted way she spoke and how she was thinking of her response beforehand told him that something was wrong. Was she lying to him? But why would she lie about something like that? He decided maybe he didn’t want to know. He said goodbye to Katya as she continued on with her cleaning.
The writer sat on his chair with a pen and notebook at hand and wrote. About a man who waited until night fell to meet a princess in a tower. But this princess was special, she didn’t hide from a dragon or a evil hag. But herself. After that he didn’t know where exactly to go from there as the critic inside him mentally broke down his work. Why would she run from herself? He didn’t know the answer, and it confused him and excited him at the same time. He stared at the dying light, shining it’s last rays before fading into nothingness.
It was time.
Luc saw her, her glossy dark brown hair radiating the dying radiance, as she entered the hallway and nervously entered the room.
“Shall… I open the door? You are okay, right?” He nodded again, speechless and trying to not make this seem any more strange. He was ripping the pages on his notebook furiously and quickly tried to soften his movement and throw the pages in the bin. “Sorry.” Valentina smiled, her face shining that wondrous light again and Luc knew something, it wasn’t the answer by it wasn’t really far from it. There was something inside her that wanted to emerge.
The hours passed by quickly, as the night grew deeper and more beautiful, the two began opening up and almost forgot their defenses and their fears. They sat on the edge of the bed, learning about one another. Their eyes locked to one another, it was like they were the only people alone in the world. The two sat intently and consumed every word that arose from the other. “Talk about you, I want to know about you.” Luc said, She looked for the words to say and trying to explain herself was akin to trying to catch a feather on a windy day. It was very complicated.
“What do you want to know?” Valentina said, leaving his gaze for a moment and instead staring at the gorgeous flowers she laid at the edge of the window sill. “Everything.” This made her anxious, but she instead tried to make it seem less of a problem than it was. “I had a normal childhood up until my parents and the rest of my family died in a accident. It obviously affected me greatly and how I dealt with it was is that I worked.” Luc gave a confused stare. “I was poor so it was the only way to support myself. It was the only way not to feel numb. I was coming back from working one night, and I was attacked. It was dreadful, felt like I was dying.” He didn’t know what to say, his attention devoted to the mysterious woman who explained in detail how she was mauled by a madman.
“So, ever since that day I haven’t felt the same. So this is why I live here to protect myself from people like you. People who cut the healed wound open.” Valentina finished, and felt her face struggle to maintain composure as she prepared herself for the tears that came slowly, then heavily down her cheeks. The pain was too much for her to handle and it wouldn’t stop. Luc put a hand on her shoulder, covered in velvet as a reaction to what he has heard. She shook his hand away. He felt a burning passion fuel deep inside him. Luc looked at her again, her face now puffy and slightly red. She was in pain. He wanted to help her and his body thought it knew.
Luc kissed her. It wasn’t something he wanted to do, at that moment it felt like his body was detached from his mind. Valentina looked at him, shocked. She felt insane, and every part of her was begging to leave this situation, push him aside.
It was too late, now he had awakened something in her. Her teeth bit down on his lips, as she felt a painful release enter her gums. She pushed him back and ran out without even uttering a word. He instead sat on the edge of the bed with a blank expression on his face, trying to decipher what had just happened between the two.
The conclusion that Luc had gone to made sense. It explained everything about her, why she would live in isolation. Why did it matter? What he knew now is that he didn’t care about what Valentina was and he honestly couldn’t care about what could happen to him. It wasn’t a difficult decision. He would take that risk or die trying.
Luc ran outside, his shoes pattering against the thick, overgrown grass. His searching had finally lead him to the dark and desolate forest where he first started. He had no idea where he was, because after a few hours of walking everything started to look uniform in appearance. The air was windy and unforgiving for the man as he looked in every section of the forest. The bare branches clawed at his skin, leaving cuts and bruises as a reminder. She had to be here, somewhere, he thought.
Until, he started to hear something. The slow, drawn out pants echoed in the distance. It was breathing. With every breath it seemed to come closer and closer. The sound amplified as Luc became more and more afraid. He backed away slightly when he saw a silhouette approaching him, where he stood at the middle of the forest. It had to be her, it had to, Luc said to himself as he took his flashlight out. He turned on his flashlight and pointed it at the clearing.
He was wrong. A man emerged from the bushes, his eyes glew a faint color of burgundy that shone through the dark forest. The stranger gave a piercing stare, that caused him to feel cold and numb. This feeling grew through every limb, muscle in his body until he was completely frozen. Meanwhile, this man was still moving towards the paralyzed Luc, his breathing becoming more like hissing. His teeth were bared out, showing his lengthening incisors. It was over, Luc thought staring at the man as he prepared to kill him.
Then, it happened. The man pounced on the frozen figure, grasping his neck as he bit into it. Luc could only scream silently as the vampire drained his life slowly. He tried his best to move, but all he could manage was a simple twitch. It was the most extreme pain he could internalize. Each second he felt weaker and weaker. He didn’t know how long he could go on anymore, he was going to die any moment now.
Although his body remained frozen, his eyes weren’t. They still moved quickly through the deep and isolated forest, looking for help. But until his eyes caught a glimpse of long dark hair fluttering about in the wind. It wasn’t, Luc thought as he slipped in and out of consciousness. In a second, his attacker was on the floor and his neck was bleeding immensely. He was struggling to not fall into to the depths of unconsciousness, to see her one probably one last time.
“Oh my god, why did you go here? Are you crazy? This forest is infested with vampires… oh no no..” It was Valentina, and she had came back for him, Luc thought. He wished she had come only a few minutes earlier, but at least Luc could see her again, one last time. He used of whatever strength he had left to whisper; “I think…I know, I love you.” before falling into the deep depths of his mind. The last thing he heard was the cries of Valentina, fading in the cold, unforgiving night.
TWO YEARS LATER
The couple sat by the fire, the warmth was enough to make one of them fall asleep.
“Val, I wasn’t done with my story!” Luc laughed as Valentina woke up, then frowned at him. “I’m excited that you got published, but it got a little tiring after the first time you told it.’’ she said, stretching her arms out. “Fair enough,” he replied as he put his arm around her.
Luc watched as her head slowly rested on the top of his shoulder. He wasn’t really complaining for what happened at the forest, those two long years ago. Sure, he had almost bled out to death but Valentina wouldn’t have saved him and given him the chance to live again. He laughed at the irony of him having to die to truly enjoy life for what it is.
They were happy and that’s what truly mattered. The two sat there for a time, until the alarm went off. The soft buzzing sound, filled the room as a machine closed the blinds and closed the curtains. “Wow, it’s perfect, and you said it was at the early stages. Just in time for the little one.” she pointed to her stomach.
They finally found what they were looking for.
So I’ve been checking up on my blog lately and I’ve decided to start posting again. So I’ve been working on a new article (it’s about winx) and I have been pondering whether I should post it to Siamo or LAD you’ll hear from me soon about that
The castle was in ruin, the staff had fled in fear.
The Queen was here and the King, inprisoned. There was no way out from the King’s sister, Princess Eva. She opened the doors to the cellar where she held the lovers, cold and hungry.
“Oh well, the opportunist and her doomed husband, care to make a statement? Any of you?” Eva said, happily.
“What happened to you Evie, you were so sweet-”
“That’s not enough to be adored across the towns, to be loved yet feared. So I needed to get power and witchcraft was my savior.”
“You’ll never take them!” The Queen said.
“Oh, I just have. Time to meet destiny’s good friend, Death!” Eva shouted.
A light appeared from her hands as they did the job for her.
All she saw was her mom and dad’s screams of agony as they were slowly vaporized.
Laurel awoke with a scream that shook the castle. Their favorite maid, Elsa was the first to arrive to Laurel’s side.
“Was there a intruder in the castle?”Elsa said.
“No, just a bad dream.” Laurel said.
Elsa left and Laurel went back and dreamt about nothin
You have probably heard of this and I will credit OP= Oblivious Prattler for inspiring me to make this article!
When people criticize Winx they usually put it in one category- Slutty Merchandise.
This a is example of Critical Research Failure (yes, I am a troper) and in some of these articles they really don’t know what they are talking about. Look at this:
New examples of the sexualization of girlhood crop up all the time. Of
course there are the dolls that look like Sesame Streetwalkers — Monster High, Winx Club, Bratz…
Okay,and I will show you a another quote:
The program in question is called ‘Winx Club,’ with some strange additional ‘Believix’ designation. I do not pretend to understand anything about it. It seems to involve fairies.
The guy who wrote this- Russell Saunders actually commented on Una Di Noi Here is the comment:
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I loved this article because I see people complaining about this and it is refreshing to see it in a another point of view.
I’ve seen a ton of posts from people complaining about Monster High. They pick at every detail that has to do with the characters. These people couldn’t be more wrong. I’m going to break everything down in sections.
Clothing: People have said that they wear “inappropriate” clothes. How are their clothes inappropriate? Because they wear heels? Because some of them wear skirts or dresses? Last time I checked, it’s normal for teenagers to wear those things. Most of them wear things that cover half or most of their legs/arms anyway. It all balances out. And, most of these “teenagers” are hundreds and even thousands of years old. Doesn’t that count for anything? Their outfits are pretty and fashionable. I don’t have ANY issues with what they wear at all. People also seem to forget that this is 2013. Not 1970. Clothing styles have changed so much over the years. All…
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Why I like Winx
When I was younger, I would wake 7am in the morning, Just to watch Winx. What glued me to the screen was the fact they were fairies. Not medieval-type fairies like Tinkerbell they were relatable and modern. It’s not like every episode was about their boyfriends. It was them doing their responsibilities like studying for tests, Protecting their school and growing up.
Then they graduated in season 4. Season 4 seemed like a effort to make more toys. Rock Band, Multiple Transformations, Magic Pets? Okay, I’m being a little negative, Actually I liked the focus on the relationships, But I hated how they finished it off. They had way too much time on their hands.
Season 5 Was okay during the pre-Harmonix episodes but got worse during the Harmonix episodes. Mainly with Tritannus. The problem? He is whiny. I would like him to be already well known as a villain between Seasons 4 and 5 then do a origin story. I also don’t like him running away with Icy every time he sees The Winx. If you’re gonna do Bonnie and Clyde at least do it right! Then he complains about how much he hates the Winx but why didn’t he kick their butts before?!
The Trix are awesome by the way. The Sirenix episodes were kind of bad at first, But got better. Example: The pillar of light and The Eclipse.
Well I noticed that S5 is less money driven than S4. That’s a plus!
Sonic Singer you are really awesome and I feel really happy to help. If I don’t get it I will still support and give advice on your two blogs
English: Actors portraying the Winx Club attend an event in Italy. Italiano: The “real” Winx!! (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
I check Una Di Noi a lot. No really I consider myself an addict. That’s not the topic I really want to talk about, So when I saw the article on Winx’s declining ratings I kinda reassured myself it will get better and with all postponing It has gotten worse. A lot of shows escape cancellation usually like moving the show to a another network a la UPN and the WB or A campaign. The most famous example is Family Guy. In its early days Family Guy suffered a plenty of what Winx is suffering now. But thanks a lot due to reruns and more than spectacular DVD sales, Family Guy is now a success.
But can Winx escape the wraith of cancellation? Maybe-uh No! Okay Winx is a worldwide phenomenon and maybe Nick can decide It is not right for the US but they see how girls on the Nick forums play fairy school and write stories. What Una Di Noi posted yesterday is to do a letter campaign. My idea is on January 2014 we can do a Winx Day because of Winx’s tenth anniversary and we can do a letter campaign like SOPA thing and we can make a sign and post on blogs and Winx Wikia
can do a blackout like Wikipedia did. But I will try the letter campaign and Thanks Sonic Singer!